Intentional Tuesday

I am going to make a regular post for Intentional Tuesday. Maybe I will get crafty and create a button for the blog...but for now, I just intent to be intentional. 

I have recently gotten back from the big party.  I've been there before.  Maybe you have too. Which one, you ask?  Were you invited, you say?  It was the big pity party, and yes, if you were around me, you were invited to join.  Sorry to those who have been a part of the festivities.  Really.

But I am no longer there.  I am here.  Here where I have been many, many times before.  Here where I say that I am making some changes in my life.  But today there is a huge difference.  Huge.

You see, in the past, when I say I am going to make changes I may say one or two out loud to people and I may write down a few, but that is not what I really mean.  What I really mean is that I am not changing one, or even a few, things.  I mean that I must change everything about who I am...right now, today.   From this day forth I will be completely different in all the ways that matter.  I will pray more, read my Bible more, eat less, eat better, be better to my husband, be a better mom, be a better friend, be a better teacher, exercise, get up early, clean the house daily, like a champ, journal, craft, blog....  You get the picture.

Not this time.  Nope.  This time I am going to be intentional about one thing.  I am going to read my Bible and I am going to pray...every day.

I spoke to a friend tonight that I have not spoken to in a few years.  She is one of the most wonderful people I know, and a true friend. You know, the kind that can tell you like it is with great love and you can hear it.  She encouraged me to just do the one thing.  Read and Pray daily.  There was a whole lot more to the conversation, but the point is that I don't have to change everything all at once.  I don't have to change any of it at all.    In fact, I can't.   I can't.   The only one who can is Jesus.  He will do the changing little by little.  From glory to glory for his sake.  I am only making a choice to be willing to do the one thing and to be honest.

How is this for honesty?  Truth is...I lost my Bible...a long time ago.  Well I was not the one who lost it, but it got lost. (He will say otherwise-but he is telling fibs if he does.)  And so I do not have one.  There is one (or maybe two) around here somewhere, though.  I will find one and use it.      One more thing...I really have no hunger for the word.  But I have a desire for a hunger, and I will be praying that it will be answered.  And I know it will.

I have been a believer for most of my life.  I know the things that I have written are not new ideas nor are they new to me or even, in part, to this blog.  I have been told these things by people who love me and whom I love.  I have chosen not to live intentionally up until now.  But tonight it is real and it is alive in me.   I cannot do it in my own strength.  I need to pray and believe that God can do all things.  I know God is real and I know he loves me.  I also know that I cannot stay, I cannot live, where I have been living. 

Intentional Tuesday #1:  Read my (or any) Bible and Pray.     No more tomorrows.  Only one thing.  Just the one thing.  Join me?

Christmas Eve again

My previous post told about how we had an early Christmas and Christmas Eve with Glen's family...

Our second Christmas Eve happened on December 24th with just me, Lori, Glen and Lylah. There was talk on the news of really bad weather including ice, sleet, and blizzard -like conditions. You never know if it will come or how bad it will really be. But it all came true this time. It started up around 4:30 in the afternoon and kept on going all the way through December 26th. But we had a wonderful Christmas Eve despite the weather. Our church canceled services, but there was another church in town that was brave enough to keep the doors open and we bundled up and went there. It was a lovely service that included 3 baptisms,the Lord's Supper, and the singing of "Silent Night" by candle light. When we left the service we had to pry our car doors open and drive through slippery, icy sludge all the way home.

Here is Lylah enjoying her candy cane--notice the red lips--
before our super- awesome frozen pizza dinner.

Lylah opened her Christmas Eve gift. It would normally be PJ's but Grammy sent them alittle earlier in the week and I had to see her in them before Christmas Eve too. She opened hermicrophone because she thought the wrapping was funny and looked like a carrot.She practiced saying, " Hello down there" as if she were speaking down a tunnel.
Here she is in her Christmas cat pj's from Grammy. It's a bad picture.
But it's the only one I could get. It's either no smile or jumping these days with her.
All my pictures seem to be a blur as of late.

In the evening we ( Glen, Lori, Lylah, and I) made gingerbread houses together. Glen made his completely snow covered and minimalist. We all agreed it was nice but it needed a door. He showed it to Lylah who said, " Oh, Dada, it's so nice and beautiful. But it has no door, does it?" He said the door got snowed under. Lylah covered her house with as much candy as possible because she was pretty sure she would get a taste of each thing before she allowed it to be attached to the house. (Again with the chipmunk cheeks) Lori and I both were trying for beauty and style. If we had had better icing we might have had better luck. Our stuff kept slipping off. But they were quite festive all sitting together in a row on the dining table.

from left: Mine, Lori's, Lylah's, Glen's

We will have to do our houses earlier next year so we can enjoy them more. I fully intended to have the houses on display with on of my favorite Christmas decorations, Santa and his Roadrunners, but I never ended up decorating much this year. I ran out of time. [ A side note for those who don't know: I was born in New Mexico and my Dad's family is from there. My grandpa used to make Santa and Roadrunners to sell at craft fairs. The roadrunner is the NM state bird. When my grandparents passed away I got this bit of Christmas nostalgia and I love it so much.]

Lylah reading the Christmas story with her Daddy ( or dada as she likes to
all him right now--I'm mama. Sounds so sweet)

After our houses were made Glen read Lylah the story of Christmas from her Jesus Storybook Bible. I love this Bible. I have cried more than once over the beauty of the storytelling and the way the author makes simple truths come to life. The subtitle says: every story whispers His name. It tells all the Old and New Testament stories from the perspective of looking to Jesus as the rescuer and redeemer of all of us. It speaks so plainly of how God loves us and wants us to know him and follow him. Lylah loves this Bible and will look at it for quite a while and tell us about the stories.
Glen read one part of the story that said that God was like a proud Daddy telling everyone about the birth of his son. She was so excited that God is a daddy too. She said," like I have a daddy...like you daddy". It brought tears to our eyes. What a responsibility we have to show her her Heavenly Father and help her to try to understand that love!

I looked and looked for a children's bible that was simple but did not speak to
children as if they were stupid, had nice illustrations,and did not leave out the Crucifixion. I found so much more in this bible than I expected.I have read it devotionally for myself several times too. It's so good.

Our tree decorated with our special ornaments and favorite lights.
All of Lylah's gifts under the branches--guarded closely by the elf in cat's pajamas.
He hardly ever left his post throughout the season.

We tucked Lylah in bed with the anticipation of getting to open presents and eat Jesus' birthday cake the next day. She was out like a light. And then Lori and Glen and I finished up her Christmas surprises, took pictures of the snow, and went to bed too. We were all pretty excited to share Christmas morning and found it hard to sleep. I think I was up at 6 waiting for Lylah to stir so I could go in and get her.

Our white Christmas. This was only the beginning...

So quit acting like a two year old already...

I have reflected on how much I am like my two year old in my spiritual life over the past few days. Here are a few examples. The other day Lylah was sitting in her car seat all strapped in and wearing a snowman purse that my mom gave her for Christmas last year. She loves to have a purse to fill with rocks, acorns, and other valuables. In this case, she was wearing the purse and decided to try to get it off as I was driving. She was tugging with all she strength to get the thing off, turning red in the face, and getting so frustrated. I saw what she was doing and told her that we would be at our destination when we turned the next corner and that I could easily get it off for her. I knew that it was a really simple solution and that she was trying to get the thing off in such a way that the only way she would have success would be if her head could detach first. She, however, in her "Do it Myself" stage, was determined and never stopped trying until I helped her, quickly and easily, when we turned the corner. I thought then that I am so much that way. I want what I want in exactly the way I want it and in exactly the time frame I want. And God is right there saying to me, in the same words I was using to my little girl, " I can fix this in just a minute, sweetie. Just let me get to the place we need to stop and I will fix it for you. You can't do it that way. You will just hurt yourself and still not get it. I promise I can fix it. Just wait just a minute." And I, like my own girl, continue to struggle and pull and turn red in the face so I can do it in my own strength, even though I don't know how to fix it. I hope, however, that I will always respond as she did by saying, "oh 'tank' you, Mommy," as soon as she was out of the bind.
The other example happened today in preschool. Poor Lylah had to be woken up to go to school today so she was not in the best of moods in the morning for class. She had been sitting in a chair and had gotten up to do something else. When she got up, another child took her chair. She came back and wanted it again but was denied. She tossed herself on the ground, fully extended and face in the ground, and cried bitterly. It was very, very dramatic and pathetic. A therapist had come in the room to work with a child and tried to speak to Lylah. She responded by saying, "Please don't talk to me right now because I am trying to cry about it." Again, so me and Jesus. I can't seem to get over myself long enough to move on or allow Jesus to console me or give me exactly what I want but in a little different form. Oh, the things our little ones show us about lives and ourselves!
I did have a good laugh about the "fit" and her heartfelt expressions, though. How could I not!? It reminded me of what she said a couple of weeks ago. I was trying to give her cream of wheat for breakfast and she said, " I'm sorry, Mommy, but my mouth is closed." I am sure I could draw some symbolic or metaphoric analogy to this saying too. I mean, I didn't start college as and English major for nothing (or end it as a psyc major, for that matter.) But I won't make any more analogies tonight. I will only say this: I am glad God has patience, and goodness, and mercy, and kindness, and so forth. He needs it for the likes of me and my stubborn ways. I am so blessed daily that he has not brushed me off or tossed me aside as a hopeless cause. Oh,"Tank" You, Jesus!